Want or Need?
Do you want to write or do you need to write?I'm headed into my fifth year of writing. The honeymoon is over.
I've netted hundreds of rejections, endured dozens of revisions. I've been through the agent hunt, the publisher hunt, the industry research. I've studied promotion and industry trends, ridden the request-for-partial roller coaster.
For the first four years, I wanted to write. Wanted to create characters and twine plot. Wanted to cultivate unexpected twists and delve into dark moments.
During the last round of the last round of revisions on the manuscript slated to hit editor's desks in the next month or two, something changed. (Revisions will do that to you.) I went through a period of about six months where I was angry. Angry that I was burnt out, that I didn't enjoy the journey anymore. Angry that I hadn't sold. But mostly, angry that while I wasn't happy, I still found myself writing everyday. Slogging through those revisions. Blogging those blogs. Entering those contests.
Recently, I discovered the root of my frustration. I'd crossed the line from wanting to write, to needing to write. In my mind, that meant writing even if I never publish. That may not seem like a big deal to may of you, a lot of writers don't seek publication but write to express themselves or for the simple love of the art. But for me--the goal-oriented overachiever--it was a very big deal.
Since that realization, I've settled into the reality of it. I've discovered that there is nothing I can do. Writing is a big part of how I process life and how I view the world. Writing is my daily catharsis, and while some days are more satisfying than others, I've discovered that whether I like it or not, writing is something I need to do.
And once again, I find myself wanting to write.
I've come full circle.
Do you write because you want to or because you need to?
Do you write because you want to or because you need to?
Labels: Joan's posts
posted by Joan Swan at 6:50 AM
3Comments:
Both. I need to write to stay sane. The times I'm away from writing too long are the times I feel anxious and out-of-sorts. But I also want to write. It's something I look forward to every day. Yeah, the thought of never selling has come into my mind a time or two, but I always push it aside. I'm doing something I love doing, and if I end up getting paid for it down the line, that's a plus. How many people get to say they're living their dream?
Both for me, too. I want to write because I love it, and I need to write because I wouldn't know what to do with all the stories in my head if I didn't put them to paper.
Yes, I need the writing to stay sane as well -- like Elisa, I need somewhere to put all those stories running around in my head.
Post a Comment
<< Home